pseudo-modernism

I just finished reading The Girld of Riyadh (thanks Neha for lending me the book). Its not the first book on the Islam or its people that I have read, its a subject that has always interested me. My friend told me this book was different. It was. An account of the lives of Saudi Arabia's velvet class, teh story of four young girls and their quest of finding love, happiness and their identity. I started reading with a sympathetic eye...poor girls - dominating men and no license to drive and I belong to the cosmopolitan Mumbai - wear lesser clothes, can drive, can go out alone, can fall in love.

Rajaa, the author of the book talks about her four friends and their lives where all but one are unsucessful because of some Saudi men who are keen to fall in love with these vivacious and outgoing women but prefer a wallflower to get married to. But that's the story here as well. I speak for myself and my life so maybe people who read this disagree with what I have to say. But inmy experience I have come across men, their dream girl is different from tehir ideal wife - Simple not evolved, loving not passionate, pretty not hot, educated not fiercely ambitious, selfless not independent, homely not wild, shy not outspoken, boring not a gypsy at heart, presentable not sexy, shy not over the top, knows to cook not to grind, makes babies and not endless love...we may call ourselves modern, the new generation, different from our parents - but listening to rock and sporting a Louis Vuitton doesn't chnage the minset. The difference between Mumbai and Riyadh is simple if you ask me - they acknowledge and believe in what tehy implement and live large within that but we under the guise of being 'cosmopolitan' still wear dhotis in our mind. I guess thats the difference between conviction and hypocrisy.

As is this

As posessive as death. As deadly as a secret. As destructive as a grapevine. As cold as an unloved heart. As loving as a puppy. As alive as life. As beautiful as the mirror. As honest as the soul. As cunning as the mind. As warm as a hug. As painful as distance. As guilty as envy. As elusive as a woman. As tempting as chocolate. As pure as making love. As absorbing as passion. As forgiving as a mother. As touching as friendship. As healthy as the morning sun. As wild as youth. As nonchalant as boredom. As reassuring as hands. As life-changing as birth. As maddening as money. As curious as a lover. As innocent as a virgin. As humble as poverty. As rich as desire. As liberating as an orgasm. As selfless as love. As unholy as infidelity. As precious as books. As sturdy as family. As old as tradition. As rooted as rituals. As baseless as rumours.

Untrue love

Untrue because I just feel love is so over-rated and is only a manifestation of the mind that we can choose to control. I think you just come in this world alone....ur partner is just a companion through the journey but u ALONE have to find your destinyand fulfil your purpose of life - so u come alone and leave this world alone. Love is just to fill the in-between void and again one must remember that there are so many different kinds of love and you can love so many different people at the same time.

Maybe not everyone would agree with what I have to say but it isn't true then why do people fight and expect things out of each other in a relationship.....in fact its the expectation that murders a relationship. If love was true why is no love unconditioal, why aren't we selfless? We are all innately selfish and hence we are all important to ourselves. The other person will be just that the OTHER person.

At this point my friend Simrath butts in - "Good thought but what about the implementation??"

Understanding the concept of "untrue love" will help in the implementation. This thought just makes understanding between two people better. We will be happy with our partners because we know that it is ME who is here for a purpose and all will fall into place. You will expect less from the other person and you will be easy on yourself in return. Its not a pessimistic attitude towards love....its a realistic one and I'm sure it is also the route to a happier relationship....I mean after all you do want to have a pleasant journey on your way to fulfilling your destiny. Who wants to be sitting with a boring grumpy partner when you have a long potholed journey ahead?

I want...

I want to hug my heart and cry. I want to eat all I want without feeling guilty or fat. I want to quit my job and travel the world. I want to have a one-night unattached, unemotional, uncommitted fling. I want buy a house on the beach. I want to get thin. I want a holiday. I want to sing for the whole world. I want to be famous. I want true love. I want to know about my past life. I want....later